Tag Archives: confidence

Sneaker Story: A Tango Tale


Submitted by Amy W.

I started Tango in my 40’s but wasn’t ready- was so frustrating and difficult — the only dance i couldnt conquer – the woman must give up control to Tango. There’s no beat, no counts, and forget going with the music.  The man decides everything! It’s a metaphor really.

After my now ex-husband wanted a divorce I started lessons again- was doing a lot of subconscious work- very difficult work at the time – I was working toward giving up control- as much as a Jewish girl can- 🙂

I now can Tango- quite well. I always say Tango is a metaphor for giving up control. Just close your eyes and let yourself be led. Only way you can tango.

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Filed under control, inspirational, self-help, Sneaker, The Sneaker Experiment

Sneaker List: Establish Expertise…

Establish expertise in my area of interest…
Submitted by Ariel R.

GOAL: Establish expertise in my area of interest by continually demonstrating (and gaining!) knowledge

EXPLANATION: I avoid doing this at home, at work, at conferences, at social gatherings. I lose sight of the point, and thereby my motivation. I lose sight of the bigger picture and get mired in day to day tasks. I lack confidence in my knowledge. I am naturally introverted.


1. Spend at least 15 minutes a day reading news and blogs

2. Spend at least 10 minutes a day talking to someone I don’t usually talk to

3. Write a blog post

4. Go to a show

5. Go to a lecture

6. Go to a meetup

7. Read an essay

8. Complete a new solo work

9. Complete a new work with coworkers

10. Obtain a speaking engagement

11. Submit to a festival


Filed under anxiety, community, goals, inspirational, lists, self-help, Sneaker, The Sneaker Experiment, to-do

Sneaker Story: Pretend to be Outgoing


(Forget that I’m actually shy…)
Submitted by Jamie D.
“I suddenly have a Eureka moment…
they don’t KNOW that I’m shy.”
I’ve never been a naturally outgoing person. I’m not inclined to strike up a conversation or initiate a friendship. But I actually realized, years ago, that this was something I could change. I’m in my mid-thirties now, and still using and refining a Sneaker moment that happened when I was just 9 years old.

Here it is:
I’m packing for a week at sleep-away camp, the summer before 5th grade, when I suddenly have a Eureka moment. No one at this camp knows me. They don’t KNOW that I’m shy. So I could just show up and ACT OUTGOING, and people will think I’m outgoing. If the experiment failed, it would sure be a looong week. But there would be a light at the end of the tunnel: camp would end and I’d never see any of these people again. So I decide to give it a shot.


I arrive at camp and say goodbye to my parents. Then I walk up to the first girl I see, and imitate every outgoing girl I’ve ever met. I prepare to speak up, smile big, and act as if we are already friends. “HI!,” I say, in a much louder voice than my usual meek tones. “I’m Jamie. What’s your name?”


The girl smiled back, and was one of the many new friends I made that week at camp. It’s been 25 years, and I’m still not a naturally outgoing person. But I remind myself before every networking event and professional cocktail party to “get my sneakers dirty,” by acting outgoing. I’ve helped my career (and my husband’s) immensely due to my apparent outgoing personality at work-related functions. And I’ve made friends and real connections with others, especially with shy people. As a shy person myself, I know exactly how they feel, and how nice it is when an extrovert walks right up and introduces herself.

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Filed under anxiety, community, goals, inspirational, lists, self-help, Sneaker, The Sneaker Experiment, to-do